OVERCOME THE STIGMA of -PTSD | Bettina Sparkles

INNER CHILD’S BEST CHRISTMAS

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When you use my way to connect with your Inner Child (IC) it will make you happy anytime and especially at Christmas time.
Every one of us individually and all humanity globally is burnt out after dealing with the Pandemic over two years.

People around the globe can pray for each other.

Or you can also follow the old saying, “Let there be Peace on Earth and let it begin with me.”

I did this by finding Inner Peace by having conversation with my Inner Child. IC., my little girl.

For you to start, open your journal and place a baby picture of yourself on top of page.

Start the first paragraph with
“Dear little…” using the name, you were called first.

You then continue, “I have neglected you way too long and not acknowledged all the bad things that happened to you as a baby and young child. But I am here for you now. Believe me when I say that you did not deserve the ill treatment. I am your good new caretaker and will always keep you safe. Would you like that?”

Little Child: “Oh, hello. I thought that you would never come to take care of me. I am so excited. You mean, you are really going to keep me safe?”

Adult You: “Yes, dear One. I promise you. I will also pay attention to how you feel, what you say, understand and love you?”

Little Child: “You mean it? It would be a much better way to live. It’s a new beginning.”

Adult You: “Yes, it’s a new start for both of us. We will both be happier. We can do this together.”

The above is one example of many dialogues you can have.

It will be the best Christmas present if you now, at this present time, let your inner child know it is good enough and deserves Love.

Our Inner Child feels so neglected because we often turn away from it and look on outside for happiness.
Happiness never comes from the out-side, NEVER.

Use my Soul-ution and find a joyous Christmas by connecting with you Inner Child, Guidance, or soul.

HAPPINESS IS AN INSIDE JOB.

Living in an Unlimited Bubble of Safety and Love

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We all live in bubbles now. How safe is yours?

Actually we live in an unlimited “Bubble” of safety and only Love.

The word “bubble” is well known in this Global Corona Virus Pandemic as a safe place to live and doing the things you want to do, i.e., professional basketball players – they protect themselves from external sources that would interfere with being able to play basketball.

I use the word ‘bubble” in this article for our Creator, all-loving God, “All there is,” our safe and Divine orderly Cosmos, all beyond our understanding and limitless.

Our “limited” life is living in faith in a smaller “bubble,” while at the same time living within the larger “endless Bubble” (represented by the my choice of an image with the bubble inside a bubble.)

Many of us have learned that we are not our body but spirit. This part of us lives forever, before we were born and after death of our body.

I call our eternal part of us, our soul, our Inner Child. Our Inner Child is our connection with our unlimited “Bubble.”

Wouldn’t you agree that “bubble” is a wonderful metaphor for God and all the other names we have for the heavenly state of mind?

Faith and connection with the unlimited “Bubble” makes me feel good and my life becomes meaningful. This belief truly makes me happier.

My Fearful Life

I am speaking from experience of a fifty-year chaotic and fearful life which I was able to gradually turn into my content life now at 80 years of age. Praise the Lord!

I’ll retell my story as long as I live to pass the information to younger generations so you can have a happier life on Earth. You see I finally found out why I always felt alone, unhappy, was addicted to alcohol and was unable to have long-lasting loving relationships.

I had a “recall” of child abuse, was diagnosed with Complex PTSD.
My recovery process led me on to a spiritual path i.e., discovered my unlimited “Bubble.”

The main process I used was conversations with my physical inner child who I never acknowledged for her suffering. My little girl stuffed all pain and carried hurts into adulthood.

In my talks with my little girl, I discovered my Inner Spirit. It took two years, but it was worth it. Slowly my faith grew. I learned more about the teachings of Christ.

From His Wisdom I began to believe in the visible and invisible, the physical and metaphysical. Also, that our soul lives forever.

In addition, Christ taught that everything that happens, happens for a reason. If it “seems” bad to us it may be an opportunity for our soul to grow.

Growing is loving ourselves and one another.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is another biggie to make that happen! That’s how we love the big “Bubble” and that is our purpose in the little “bubble”.

Yes, dear readers, even though we don’t know our expansive, eternal “Bubble,” Christ said we are One with IT.

Living in our life’s “bubble” and knowing we connect with the “All there Is Bubble” means we are together, safe, never alone and loved.

You too can have more Inner Peace, by believing that Christ said, “I AM with you always, in all ways forever.”

Appreciate yourself and be happy! Don’t you agree, we are happy children, playing in the small and big “Bubble” forever.

If you have difficulties with this, please recite the Serenity Prayer used by Alcoholics Anonymous.

I include it here with its other verses rarely read.

The Full Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him

Forever and ever in the next.
Amen.

Mental Health Cases and Covid-19

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MENTAL HEALTH CASES SKY-ROCKET SINCE COVID-19 PANDEMIC

What can you do to help yourself?

First of all, You must acknowledge that the virus touched everyone on planet Earth.

The Mental Health Community is unable to address the increased volume of mental ailments caused by the Pandemic, at least in the near future.

PTSD symptoms such as depression, anger, high anxiety & others have increased, causing more suicides, as well.

Since not enough help is available by the Mental Health Communities, I recommend we take 3 simple steps ourselves to prevent these mental, emotional, or spiritual health issues from taking root in our bodies.

Here are 3 healing steps which worked in my PTSD Recovery:

STEP 1

The moment negative feelings come up, share and express them. “Revealing is healing” is a mental health motto.

Choose someone you trust. It can be a family member or close friend. Even though one may have Covid-19 or even perceive the Pandemic from a distance, all of us experience some trauma symptoms.

STEP 2

In case you have no one to talk to start a FEELING JOURNAL right away.

For example, start writing, “Today, when I saw a young nurse, mother of three, pass on to the other side from the Virus, I was filled with sadness.” You may have actually had tears rolling down your cheeks or were choking on them.

Write down how that felt.

Did it remind you of the loss of someone in your family?
Or were you feeling fear of your own death.
How terrible for you.
You must acknowledge every detail.

STEP 3

This is my favorite method.

Another approach is to have a dialogue with your Inner Self to acknowledge that your event was traumatic for you.

“Dear ____,(use your name) you had a good reason to be upset.”
Pause a moment. Let the feelings come up.
Feel your feelings.
You may hear an Inner Voice Answer.
WRITE IT DOWN.
The inner voice may be saying something like, “WOW. I am glad I am recognizing this upset. I feel relief and not so upset anymore. Thanks.”
Write as much as you like, then stop.
See how you feel the next day.
Make another short “How I AM FEELING RIGHT NOW” journal entry.
Keep doing this until the event isn’t getting you down anymore.
Try rating the pain each day. I usually rate the pain from 1-10, 10 being the highest.
When the number is lowered to 1, we have been successful with our self-healing.

OTHER PTSD SYMPTOMS

We often project our anger at others when we don’t do our feeling work.
(I was accused of being a “snapping turtle” years ago before counseling.)
We may also be triggered to remember specific childhood maltreatment.

Again, these issues can be released by repeating Step1,2, or 3. Most issues can be healed with this process.

THE STEPS MUST BE DONE IMMEDIATELY as soon as you become aware of them.
This allows you to start healing your painful wounds sooner than later and you will be much happier in the future.

If you wish to have a conversation with me, please contact me. Start with an email. Bettina [@] BettinaSparkles.com

How to Avoid COVID-19 PTSD

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The Corona Virus Pandemic has had an effect on us all. It has been over a year with many loved ones gone, life situations changed, and the end of the confinement and cautions still months out.

No matter how you experience the Corona Virus Pandemic, you may experience strong, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) symptoms for years. To prevent PTSD from taking root in your physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual bodies, you must take at least some of the following steps.

Step 1

Immediately share whatever you are feeling with someone you trust like a family member or close friend. The experiences you have may be different but common symptoms include severe anxiety, depression, anger or sadness from loss, fear, and many more similar feelings.

Step 2

In case you have no one to share with, start a FEELING JOURNAL right away.

Did it remind you of the loss of some one in your family? Or were you feeling fear of your own death. How terrible for you.
You must acknowledge every detail and express the feeling.

Step 3

This is my favorite method.

You can also have a dialogue with your Inner Self to acknowledge that your event was traumatic for you.

“Dear ____,(use your name) you had reason to be upset.”

Pause a moment. Let the feelings come up. Feel your feelings.

You may hear an Inner Voice Answer. WRITE IT DOWN.

It may be something like, “WOW. I am glad I am recognizing how this upset me. I feel relief, more self-compassion. I do not feel so upset anymore. Thanks.”

Write as much as you like, then stop. See how you feel the next day. Make another short “How I AM FEELING RIGHT NOW” journal entry. Keep doing this as long your experience comes popping up in your mind. I usually rate the pain from 1-10, 10 being the highest. When the number is lowered to 1, we have been successful with our self-healing.

Take Note:

Your mindset may also show up in relationships. If you don’t do your feeling work, you’ll project your anger at others. I was accused of doing that and was called a “snapping turtle” years ago before counseling.

Repeat using Step1,2, or 3 often.

You may also be triggered to remember some childhood maltreatment. Please address this in the same manner. Use the above steps to move yourself through these memories.

You are not alone in reacting to the Pandemic. The crisis is affecting everyone.

It is most important that you prevent the PTSD to be with you in the future and use the 3 Steps listed.

Heal your painful wounds sooner than later and you will be much happier.

WHY “GET OFF’ THE ROLLER COASTER RIDE

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Trauma as a rollercoaster BettinaSparkles.com

Has your life been like a chaotic roller coaster ride way too long?

I, too, suffered many ups and downs from a very young age into adulthood. All of us deserve smoother sailing in life. I was finally able to get off my wild ride.

I am eager to share how I stopped the roller coaster.

Please note 2 important facts:

1^st Abused children carry the burden of trauma usually without ever healing it.

2^nd The weight of unhappiness increases constantly because many new traumas are laid upon the original trauma.

A divorce was one of my added traumas piled on top of all the earlier ones. This event made me feel worse than ever. I married at age 26 & divorced at 28. The man I had married was a good man but I was the unhappy one and never looked for solutions.

Instead I chose to run.

Even though “I” chose the separation, I felt horrible immediately afterwards and for the next 15 years. I felt like “a total “failure” -helpless, hopeless and all alone with many inner struggles. At the time I didn’t know that my destructive behavior was caused by the symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress –PTSD-which infested my mind. Instead, I wrongly blamed My Higher Power or God for the mess I was in.

You can probably relate to the following actions. I tried to fill the emptiness by looking for Love in all the wrong places. I focused on physical good looks. I searched for a “prince charming” who I believed would solve my problems. I also drank more alcohol. It gave me temporary relief but caused me to make more foolish choices. “Failing relationships” is a major PTSD symptom.

How was I able to finally stop the roller coaster of insanity?

Some people must have noticed that I was “smiling on the outside but crying on the inside” and, showing a lot of insecurity. One day my friend, Linda, reached out to help me. She knew I didn’t have any relationship with God. She shared that years back she had also gone through rough times, just like me, but with the Grace of God she found new happiness.

Here’s Linda’s solution. A friend gave her the Unity Daily Word, a devotional booklet. Now, she was risking doing the same for me. She said for me to simply read one little page per day. I did as she suggested. Dear Readers, I was praying again and soon felt comforted.

Slowly, my ideas about an unfriendly God changed. After a year, I began to believe that the Nature of God is only Love, which does not punish. Also, praying opened the door for me to be diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder – PTSD – and, gave me the strength to choose recovery.

As my PTSD healing progressed, I was led unto a beautiful spiritual path.

As a closer relationship with God evolved I became happier and happier. All my spiritual practices and reading materials gave me more inner peace than I had ever experienced before and still does to the day I am writing this.

The “Helping Hand of God” working through Linda saved my life.

I hope my example shows you how easy it is to get off a chaotic roller coaster ride.

Blessings.

PTSD TRIGGERS: 3 BEST STEPS TO COPE

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#1 First, we must totally understand “triggers.”

WHAT ARE PTSD TRIGGERS?

Those of us who have been diagnosed with PTSD have had an “original” trauma and experience natural human responses of shock, helplessness, panic, screams, tears and more.

As we move on with life we could have “new” traumas.

These usually “trigger” the same emotions we experienced for the first one, and are not necessarily related what is happening in the “now.”

#2 This takes us to the second step. We question:

WHY DO I REACT SO FEARFULLY ALL OVER AGAIN?

My PTSD experience may help explain. I had Child Abuse Recall at 50. When horrific traumatic memories surfaced, I experienced “original reactions in real time” because I never was allowed to express my emotions and I never had a chance to heal my old wounds.

You see, I had been threatened to keep “it” all a secret and was told no one would help, not even God. The threat was abandonment which is death to a little girl. All my fears were stuffed deep inside of me, forgotten and festering causing me to be very unhappy most of my life.

Now other victims “choose” not clear up the deep wounds of trauma. They dread to face the past and hate to talk about “dirty death secrets” because they wonder, “What will people think?” Sufferers also may not know where to turn and how to start the process of healing.

#3 The third step is the most important one. If we don’t heal the “original” trauma as soon as we can, we will experience “PTSD Triggers” more severely. If we heal the first trauma and we experience new crises, then we can handle them more easily by using the tools we used the first time around.

We me must feel our feelings of the new chaos. Processing the trauma is not only expedited but we also don’t get stuck in the PTSD symptoms for years, as we did before. It took me years and years of living in fear and unhappiness after my “original” childhood trauma, and now I get over the new crises in three weeks to three months. Isn’t it worth a little effort to cope better with “PTSD Triggers?”

Here’s my PTSD mantra: “Set Your PTSD Free and Live in Harmony.”

To learn more check out my book “Set Your PTSD Free” click the link below.

SET YOUR PTSD FREE: 7 Effective Ways to Heal Trauma

TOP SECRET ABOUT CHILDHOOD PTSD

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Are you experiencing too many PTSD Triggers? Do you still get “startled” or “react with rage or suffer other symptoms?

I have shocking news for you. You haven’t fully released all your childhood demons or core PTSD issues.

The least known fact about PTSD is that it may have started in the womb. I experienced my first trauma in the womb because I survived an abortion attempt. Babies learn mistreatment quickly by taking snapshots of facial expressions. These are wordless clues interpreted by the newborn as loving or not. For example, the frowns at diaper changing meant, “I must be bad, it’s my fault, I am in the way and I must please.”

Too many negatives or abuse in childhood form a gloomy outlook on life. Since as children we have no options, we bury unfelt emotions of shame and unloved feelings in the bottom of our hearts where they stay. The early deep wounds block us from experiencing love and cause our self-destructive behavior as we become adults. New traumas are piled upon us. The inner wounds fester, keeping us from living a healthy, normal life. For us to find our “real” joyful self, we must revisit our childhood just one more time and go deep to thoroughly clean out past hurts for good.

Here’s part of my story. I lived in fear with high anxiety, hyper-vigilance and chronic depression. Then I had sudden Child Abuse Recall and was lucky to find a wise psychologist. He diagnosed my Child Abuse PTSD and immediately asked me what I remembered about my first 7 years of my life. “I don’t remember anything.” The counselor said “I’ll help you dig.”

The therapist suggested I have pretend conversations between my abandoned little girl and my adult, a new loving caretaker. The following is an example of how easy it is to have inner conversations. The counselor would have me take deep breaths to relax.

I, as the new compassionate caretaker, began. “Hi, little Bettina are you there. I am here to help you. I am so very sorry I’ve neglected you for such a long time.”

I, as the Inner Child, spoke up with surprise and in manner of a child. “Hello. I never thought anyone would come. I’ve been so alone, lonely and scared.”

I, as the caretaker, spoke softly, “I am here for you now to pay attention to you. It’s difficult for me to believe that terrible things happened to you so long ago and you thought you were all alone.”

I responded as I felt my child quiver, “No one came to help. When you were anxious you had no time for me.”

I, the new caretaker felt her pain. “You don’t have to be afraid anymore. I will take care of you and listen to you.”

Again, I felt my little girl, who seemed so relieved. “When you calm down, I can calm down. You have come to understand and love me?”

For both of us I was encouraged and felt hope, “Yes, You are very important to me.

We can help each other. I love you.”

Tears of joy were rolling down my cheeks. This process of having verbal or written conversations for my child and me healed my ancient deep wounds.

Are you ready to clear up your childhood PTSD and live in harmony?

“WANNA BE” POD CASTER INTRO…

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Hi, again friends…and welcome to a few more glimpses at my life.

Some of you already know I had a 38-yr. flying career which was a perfect gift from God because I loved people and loved to travel… and still do. The long career was the “stability” in my life. I was a Flight Attendant but, back in 1965 when I started, we were called Stewardesses, sometimes “Stews.” The main job requirements were: single ladies, ages 21-27, no glasses, a certain weight and height, 4 yrs. of college or two years of public contact work. I qualified, was hired and I was very excited about my future. I worked for a small airline; all employees knew each other well. We were like family.

Airports and Airlines were so different then. During that era, the public, referred to us as the “Coffee, tea, or me?” group. Checking in did not involve going through any security, imagine that? Also, there were no passenger bridges or jet ways and people could smoke on the entire aircraft. Many books were written about those fun-flying days.

Although flying was the bright side of my life, there was an ominous dark side. As much as I enjoyed my work and functioned OK, I was wearing a mask. You see, I was smiling on the outside but crying on the inside, and I didn’t know why I was so unhappy and felt so alone. I also wasn’t aware that I had unusual anxiety, anger spells or depression. My firm belief was, “That’s just how life is.” I had no hope things could ever change for me. But, God had different plans for me.

I finally got an answer to why I was sooo unhappy at age 50, when I was diagnosed with Child Abuse PTSD-Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I was in shock, and I felt like it was all happening right then. To make my long story short, I went to a therapist who advised that I had to face the pain of my childhood, in order to release it and feel better. The other choice was continuing life down an unhappy, destructive path. I didn’t have anything to lose and I was “willing” to go for it!

After a couple of years healing work I realized how my attitude had changed and how much better I was feeling. It hit me big time that I desired to pass on the good news and help other sufferers. I began to talk and write about my experiences and proclaim: NO ONE HAS TO ACCEPT A SUFFERING LIFE…pain happens but continual suffering is a choice.

I just love to talk about my transformation. The old Bettina lived mostly in fear, didn’t trust others, and lived feeling alone & unhappy in her heart. The new happier Bettina “Sparkles” has found peace and lives a spiritual life. I’d like you to envision me as a dear relative or friend who you can trust, tell your problem, reach out to for help, and know you’ll receive support, understanding and love.

OVERCOME THE STIGMA of -PTSD- Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

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Hi friends.

Let’s get over “what other people think about us” as we cope with life and search for happiness. Victims of trauma must put “Stigma” on the backburner to heal. It’s important for us to acknowledge our struggles, process them, so we can move on and live in peace.

Not so long ago actions and reactions were cause for us to be labeled “crazies” and material for mental institutions. Even during my career I worried that if the company found out much about my mental turbulence, I would get fired. But, there’s been a big shift!

Thankfully, The Mental Health Community has acknowledged PTSD, as a mental disorder which requires urgent care. Professionals agree that if feelings of traumas are not expressed and let go within a year, PTSD may develop.

People who experience any kind of TRAUMA- such as bullying, accidents, shootings, natural disasters, death, severe physical illnesses, divorces, rape, abortions, and loss of houses, child abuse, terrorism or war-MUST DEAL WITH THE EVENT IMMEDIATELY- NO MATTER WHAT THE CAUSE.

Right afterwards, we must acknowledge that something horrific happened to us and that our reactions are normal. We may be in shock, scream, and cry IT’S ALL OK. It’s important to talk to friends or professional and express our feelings.

Please know that if we don’t release hurtful feelings within 1 year, PTSD develops. We start to have a very negative outlook about ourselves, our life and the world, in general. This is no way to live.

Why let “Stigma” go? It is to save our lives. When we find our struggles are so unbearable we must find help. Here’s a glimpse of my life, of how I suffered and what finally worked for me.

On the outside, I wore a “Smiley Mask” and seemed to function OK in life and my beloved flight attendant career. On the inside I suffered from “unaware” Child Abuse PTSD until age 50. All my life I felt inner chaos, fear of people, unworthy, unwanted and unloved, all alone, helpless and hopeless. I began “Looking for Love in all the wrong places,” outside of me and medicated the pain with alcohol.

During that dark time I got divorced and felt like a total failure. I placed blame on everyone but me. I even blamed God and put “the punishing God” on the backburner for 20 years. The action made life even more miserable.

I’ll never forget how my dear friend, Linda, came to the rescue and caused me to have a “wake-up call” when I was 45. She knew I didn’t have a relationship with God. Hesitantly, she told me that she was once in the same place as I was. She said, “A friend gave me a Daily Prayer booklet which changed my life, and now I’d like to do the same for you.”

Linda stuck a daily devotional pamphlet into my purse. She suggested I read one page a day. I did. Every day I was infused with hope and love. I did this for 5 years and made many life-style changes.

Most importantly my mind was opened to an all-loving God. When I had Child Abuse Recall God helped me seek a therapist and face the pain of my childhood. PTSD Recovery deepened my spiritual journey for the last 30 years.

Set Your PTSD Free and live in Harmony!

DEDICATED TO MY PTSD HERO

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This Blog is to honor my PTSD HERO: Michele Rosenthal Award-Nominated Author, Speaker, Post-Trauma CoachFounder, www.HealMyPTSD.com; Radio Host, CHANGING DIRECTION; Author, BEFORE THE WORLD INTRUDED: Conquering the Past and Creating the Future

Hi dear Readers. I am Bettina “Sparkles” and I desire that my writings can play a small part in the prevention of Child Abuse as well as help others to turn their lives around SOONER than I did. Fifty years I was NOT “aware” of living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder-PTSD. Many false ideas and beliefs (FIBS) caused me to carry burdens of anger, depression, resentment, insecurity, failed relationships and many other fears. I was unhappy and thought “that’s the way life is.”

Not true! We’re all empowered to heal mental, emotional, and spiritual struggles, right here and right now. I turned my life around and you can, too!

I open my heart to you in my first book, FLYING WITH GOD, Putting on a Happy Face. The memoir reveals two trauma whammies, first, growing up in Germany during WWII, and second, being abused by a family member. All unexpressed hurtful feelings were forgotten and buried deep inside the bunker of my mind.

Yet, wearing a happy facade, I was able to function in life, explore America, my new home, and serve with pride in my “stewardess” profession of 38 years. No one knew that all the time I was smiling on the outside, I was actually miserable and crying on the inside.

FLYING WITH GOD is an easy read, revealing airline scoop about “the early days of flying.” It’s a personal as well as historical perspective which can be enjoyed by old and new flyers, people of all ages, and even potential flight attendants. Vintage photos are included.

I was also guided to write another book, SET YOUR PTSD FREE, 7 Effective Ways to Heal Trauma. The mini self-help book starts with a short narrative of my Child Abuse Recall which led to diagnosis of PTSD and moves on with the sequence of recovery processes and tools which worked for me.

As I learned to heal conflicting, self-defeating thoughts in my mind, I grew in spiritual understanding. The healing gave me a sense of “who” I am and “why” I am here, and has given me inner peace and appreciation for life. I am more content now than I have ever been before and wouldn’t change any of the ups and downs of my entire life.

In SET YOUR PTSD FREE, you’ll note my drastic transformation, which I’d like to pass on with my articles, blogs, books and mentoring. I’m most grateful that I recovered from my old wounds, and that I can write about my pain of the past “without hurting anymore.”

SET YOUR PTSD FREE AND LIVE IN HARMONY.

http:setyourptsdfree.com